Stripper Madness
News

Even though nobody expects anything more than mediocrity in most strip clubs, San Diego's clubs fail to even show up on the titillation radar. To make matters worse, the strippers are now stabbing patrons who refuse lap-dances. The stab-happy stripper, 24-year old Lawanda Dixon, had a canister of methamphetamines with her, which had me hoping this was off in the wastelands of El Cajon. Turns out the incident took place on Convoy, practically in my own backyard.

I never thought I'd say this, but if any of you incoming students were planning on having rheumy vagina awkwardly thrust into your face you might be better off biting the bullet and heading to goddamn Tiajuana.

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Aleph Solo, Sep 08 2005, 12:38 AM


London Explosions, G8 Terror
Events, News

Multiple blasts have paralyzed London, with six underground blasts being reported as well as explosions on double-decker buses above-ground. This comes just after the IOC announcement, and right at the beginning of the G8 summit. Keep an eye on the BBC News feed for updated information. No sense in bothering with CNN or anything.

Yeah, this isn't related directly to UCSD. I think it's fair to say that it's still a goddamn important thing to keep on eye on.

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Aleph Solo, Jul 07 2005, 03:35 AM


UCSD Student Dies in Car Crash
News

ERC student Katy Jovin died in an accident on the 5 near Mission Bay Park when her Mustang crossed into opposing traffic and struck a Ford Ranger. Full story here.

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Nom de Guerre, Jul 06 2005, 11:13 PM


Join the Circle Jerk
Pleas

We know that certain campus figures (who all look like they were home-schooled—you know who you are) have speculated as to who we are. Sometimes they have been wrong, and other times they have been completely wrong. Four of us are good and intoxicated in one room at the moment, so we thought we would publicly address the possibilities.

Carol Freire seems a likely candidate, and has been known to accept responsibility for the site, but she failed our literacy test. Does not write for YouCSD.

Jeremy Cogan is jerking off in the closet, but he does not write for YouCSD.

Joseph Watson fucking hates Marye Anne Fox. This site is his revenge. Writes for YouCSD.

Marye Anne Fox developed a cunning scheme to mobilize the campus population against the co-ops and Warren College Coke machines, thereby distracting everyone from the landfill being constructed in Pepper Canyon. Ingenious. Writes for YouCSD sdfio;78jsdfgosdig drunk.

The original point of this entry was to let you kids know that some of us are graduating, but the site will continue. We need new writers, and they will be you. Unless you were home-schooled. E-mail us with a one-page personal statement on your greatest accomplishment and most embarrassing moment. Also, fuck you.

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Nom de Guerre, Jun 19 2005, 12:36 AM


Earthquake!
Events

Those of you still in Southern California have probably just felt one of our trademark earthquakes. The SCEC already has what they're calling "Version #B" of an earthquake data sheet online. This particular bastard was magnitude 5.6, centered about twenty miles southwest of Palm Springs. For those of you born and raised here, it was just another "hmm the ground is shaking"-style event. Most of us from Southern California don't even consider anything under magnitude 3.5 or so to be worth fretting over. A 5.6 is enough to pique one's interest, though. I'd bet that those of you not from the area were justifiably freaked out as, when you get to the heart of the matter, the goddamn earth was quaking. That shit ain't right.

My own bedroom is on the second floor. The house started shaking, I waited a second to see if I was going to die, then just sort of shrugged and continued about my business. I lived through the Northridge quake in 1994. I think I'm a bit jaded.

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Aleph Solo, Jun 12 2005, 09:16 AM


Campus crusade for, like, whatever.
Anecdotes

So, this the issue that finally got somebody on campus motivated enough to spread flyers and signs in an attempt to effect change. While on some level I'm glad that somebody at UCSD cares enough to do anything, I had hoped that the trigger would have been, like, something important? Y'know, something that's, like, political or actually significant or whatever. Y'know?

Hell, whoever it was that put these things together could have at least made the smaller flyers simple and readable. I doubt many people are going to be stopping on crowded and rushed pathways to read some text about the usage of "like."

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Aleph Solo, Jun 03 2005, 01:14 PM


Desperate Commencement
News, Rants

rc.jpgAccording to UCSD News, actor Ricardo Chavira, who plays the role of "Carlos Solis" on the popular show Desperate Housewives, will speak to the graduates of Earl Warren College. Berkeley got Warren Beatty and we get some bad actor that no one has heard of. I'm sure he will have plenty of intelligent advice for all of us.

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Little Johnny Jewel, Jun 03 2005, 12:55 AM


Housing Advisor Hijinks
Events, Gossip, News

It would appear that this isn't a good year for student employees of the University. We've been told that no less than five of the Housing Advisors from Muir College have either resigned or been fired for unbecoming conduct. According to what information we've become privy to, two of the HAs were intercepted by law enforcement while trying to drive a university-owned golf cart to the cliffs overlooking the beach. Both were fired. Word has it that another decided it would be a good idea to throw a Sun God party in his or her room – the party host was fired, and it's believed that two other HAs who were at the party ended up resigning. We'd be glad to receive any clarifications, confirmations, or information from people involved, especially those students in the dorms who were left without advisors in the last few weeks of the school year.

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Aleph Solo, May 31 2005, 10:59 PM


A Brief Rebuttal & Raucous Confessions
Rants

Robin Marie Averbeck did us the favor of advertising our site in yesterday's Guardian despite the fact that we have been mostly silent for the past several weeks. Unfortunately, Robin did us all a disservice when she took a surplus of smarmy introspection and clumsily applied it to an entire burgeoning medium.

To call you a "dedicated blogger," Robin, would be to equate a finger-painting kindergartener with Van Gogh. Although your vacuous, juvenile, oft-aborted blogs (examples one, two, and three) are brimming with the self-absorption you describe, you do not have the right nor experience to paint anyone else with the same brush.

Please review the two entries directly preceding this one. By ignoring our earnest efforts to inform the student body of relevant, attention-deserving events, your commentary immediately loses all credibility and any hope of professionalism. (Although, in your defense, anyone still reading your columns at this point in the year must already anticipate as much.) Your column is so shallow and uninformed that as I compose this brief diatribe I fear re-reading it lest my mind erode with every passing word.

Vitriol will always find a venue (visit any bathroom stall in Geisel), and blogs have never been limited to the emo or nerdy (the mere fact that these words find their way into your sputum-cum-analysis makes me cringe). Additionally, there are far richer wells of embittered exclamations for you to decry: the newly-formed LiveJournal community UCSanDiego began an entertaining and anarchistic confessions thread so successful that we received several email notices of its existence within 24 hours of its creation. Your ill-conceived, confused protest of YouCSD would be right at home there, Robin.

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Nom de Guerre, May 24 2005, 01:49 AM


Pork Barrelling in A.S.
News

On the agenda this week in A.S.:

1. A proposal changing A.S. bylaws to allow the council to fund organizations' summer travel expenses. Submitted by Senator Jason Hoskins.

2. A request for summer travel expenses ($400) from a fraternity of which Senator Jason Hoskins is a member.

Obviously, this is a complete coincidence.

The change to the bylaws is not discreet. A.S. doesn't collect money over the summer, and the budget is already stretched thin. Also, fraternities almost never come asking A.S. for this sort of stuff. Word is that it might pass because no one wants to accuse Hoskins of his own blatantly self-serving actions. But this has generated a significant amount of chatter - enough to prompt Hoskins to send out an e-mail which didn't try to explain his motives, but instead focused on complaining about all the trash talk.

Funny stuff. Council votes Wednesday.

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Prescott Andover, May 23 2005, 02:32 PM


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